Placeholder text taken from The IT Crowd

I'm a 32 year old IT-man who works in a basement. Yes, I do the whole Lonely Hearts thing! Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of... You know, it's high tide. But we're not on the coast. I'm closed for maintenance! Closed for maintenance? I've fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some strong arguments. I'm a 32 year old IT-man who works in a basement. Yes, I do the whole Lonely Hearts thing! No, that's the music you hear when... I'm sorry are you from the past? I'm going to murder you... You bloody woman! Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again?

When I started Reynholm Industries, I had just two things in my possession: a dream and 6 million pounds. Hello, IT. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot? Oh my God. I didn't even know Smarties made a cereal. They don't. It's just Smarties in a bowl with milk. Dear Sir stroke Madam. Fire, exclamation mark. Fire, exclamation mark. Help me, exclamation mark. 123 Carrendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best, Maurice Moss. While he was eating, did you hear anyone laughing? Like... in the kitchen area? Yes! Yes I did, actually, yes I did. That'd be trouser food! When I started Reynholm Industries, I had just two things in my possession: a dream and 6 million pounds. I am a man, he's a man, we're men! Ok, tell me how your feeling. I feel delicate... and annoyed, and... I think I'm ugly.

While he was eating, did you hear anyone laughing? Like... in the kitchen area? Yes! Yes I did, actually, yes I did. That'd be trouser food! I'm a 32 year old IT-man who works in a basement. Yes, I do the whole Lonely Hearts thing! Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again? I am a man, he's a man, we're men! Ok, tell me how your feeling. I feel delicate... and annoyed, and... I think I'm ugly. No, no there you go, no there you go. I just heard it come on. Yeah, you need to turn it on... uh, the button turns it on. When I started Reynholm Industries, I had just two things in my possession: a dream and 6 million pounds.

I am a man, he's a man, we're men! Ok, tell me how your feeling. I feel delicate... and annoyed, and... I think I'm ugly. It's like they're pally-wally with us when there's a problem with their printer, but once it's fixed... Yeah, you need to turn it on... uh, the button turns it on. You mean 999. Yes, yes, I mean 999! Yeah, I know. That's the American one, you berk! Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again? Shut up, do what I tell you, I'm not interested; these are just some of the things you'll be hearing if you answer this ad. I'm an idiot and I dont care about anyone but myself. P.S. No dogs! It's like they're pally-wally with us when there's a problem with their printer, but once it's fixed...

Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of... Yeah, you need to turn it on... uh, the button turns it on. How long have you been disabled? Ten years? Ten years, and how did it happen? If that's not a rude question. Acid? Unbelievable! Some idiot disabled his firewall, meaning all the computers on Seven are teeming with viruses, plus I've just had to walk all the way down the motherfudging stairs, because the lifts are broken AGAIN! No, no, that's the music you heard when it come on. You can come down here any time and I'll be waiting for you! [slams down phone] That told her! Oh really? Then why don't you come down and make me then.

No, no there you go, no there you go. I just heard it come on. See the driver hooks a function by patching the system call table, so its not safe to unload it unless another thread's about to jump in there and do its stuff, and you don't want to end up in the middle of invalid memory! OK. Moss, what did you have for breakfast this morning? Smarties cereal. So, remember the new number! 0118 999! 88199, 9119 725! ... 3! Hello, IT. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot? Carrie, Moss! First scene in Carrie! Oh. Okay We don't need no education. Yes you do. You've just used a double negative.

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